Screen Time for Toddlers
Hi. I’m Stephanie Hatleli, a pediatric speech therapist and a mom — and my toddler watches TV.
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When I first became a mom, I was so worried about doing everything the “right” way. I questioned myself constantly. It wasn’t until I had my second baby that I was finally able to let go a little and trust myself more. Trust that I get to decide what works best for my family.
And in our house, my toddler watches TV.
I use TV as a tool to help me do something else — because we all know that toddlers (especially on certain days) are not exactly forgiving. I turn it on when his baby sister needs my undivided attention (when she’s sick, teething, or sometimes when she goes down for a nap), if I need to make an important phone call, if I want to catch up on something in my own life, to clean, or honestly… sometimes just to take a minute to breathe on really hard days.
I’m not suggesting that you do exactly what I do. I just want parents to feel less shame around the decisions they’re making. Because we’re all out here doing our best.
My TV boundaries
This is what works for me — in case anything here resonates with you.
We watch TV (not phones or tablets). Phones and tablets are harder for me to manage and usually end in more frustration, for both of us. TV feels more contained and predictable in our house, so that’s what we stick to.
I use a timer. I always set a timer when I turn on the TV (I’ve linked the one we use). When the timer goes beep beep, the TV goes off.
This way, I’m not the bad guy turning it off, and a lot of the big emotions around “one more episode” don’t pop up for us. The timer does the talking.
I carefully choose shows I feel good about. When my child is watching TV, I may not be right there the whole time — so it’s important to me that I trust what he’s watching.
Right now, he loves Trash Truck on Netflix and Daniel Tiger on YouTube TV. These are two shows I’ve screened and feel comfortable with, which makes a big difference for me.
No hard limits. Every day looks different, so I don’t set a strict amount of TV time. Some days we watch no TV at all or just ten minutes, and other days it might add up to about an hour. It really depends on what’s going on and how our family is doing that day. Not having a firm limit helps me avoid feeling guilty on the days we need a little more support.
If you’re using TV to help teach your toddler new, co-viewing is ideal
Co-viewing — when parents and children engage in screen time together — is the best way for toddlers to actually learn from screens. Co-viewing allows you to connect what your child is seeing and hearing on the screen to their real life, which helps them practice new skills and remember what they’ve learned.
Best practices for co-viewing with your toddler:
Practice words throughout the day. Try to notice which words or ideas come up in the shows your child watches and bring those words back into everyday moments. If a show talks about trucks, animals, or feelings, keep using those same words during play, meals, and routines.
Pick one category from the show and bring it into real life. If your child is watching a show that focuses on a specific theme — like farm animals, vehicles, or helpers — have toys, books, or objects from that category ready to go.
For example, if a show features farm animals, grab farm toys, puzzle pieces, or a farm book. When “sheep” shows up on the screen, pull out the toy sheep. Let it run across the table, give your child silly sheep kisses, or pet the sheep’s wool in a book. Pretend the sheep is eating, taking a nap, or going for a ride.
Keep the play going after the TV turns off. When the show ends, leave those toys out for continued play. Maybe read a related book at bedtime or talk about what your child saw earlier in the day. The goal is for TV to be one tool — not the main way your child learns new words. Real learning happens through experience, repetition, and play.
Use screens for connection, too
Screens can also be meaningful when they’re used to connect with friends and family through FaceTime, Zoom, or Skype. We live far away from all our family, and FaceTIme is a tool we use frequently!
Encourage grandparents or loved ones to practice certain sounds or vocabulary with your child. Have them do a little show-and-tell from their space. Invite them to pretend-play together — giving tickles, reading books, or even blowing bubbles (both you and the family member would need bubbles).
These are all examples of co-viewing — a parent watching with or alongside their child and then pulling what’s seen on the screen into real-life experiences.
At the end of the day, screen time is just that — a tool. It’s something parents can use when they need support, when life is busy, when another child needs attention, or when everyone just needs a pause. It’s also a way for toddlers to see new words, ideas, routines, and experiences, especially when we watch with them and help connect what’s on the screen to real life. TV doesn’t replace play, connection, or hands-on learning — but it doesn’t have to be the enemy either. When used intentionally and without shame, screen time can be one small part of a full, healthy, very human childhood. And if today needed a little more TV than yesterday, that’s okay too.
If you’re looking for more formal guidance around screen time, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) updated their screen time recommendations in 2019. Across all ages, they emphasize that co-viewing (watching with a parent or caregiver) is preferred over solo screen time. You can find the full chart and a more detailed explanation directly from the AAP here:
https://www.healthychildren.org/English/family-life/Media/Pages/Healthy-Digital-Media-Use-Habits-for-Babies-Toddlers-Preschoolers.aspx
Written By:
Stephanie Hatleli, MS CCC-SLP
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