Supporting toddlers with transitions
Transitioning between activities, like leaving the park and getting in the car, can be challenging for many toddlers. Their frustration during transitions generally arises from the uncertainty and lack of control over what they can do.
Toddlers typically transition between activities more happily when caregivers give them clear and concrete expectations of what is going to happen next. In this lesson, we’ll learn how to support your toddler to complete transitions happily.
Tips for helping toddlers with transitions
Tip 1 - Be consistent in your transitions regardless of the activity
In learning to smooth your child’s transitions, it’s important to use the same type of transition whether your child wants to stop an activity or not. This ensures that your child won’t create a negative association with transitions.
When choosing a transition strategy, pick one that’s easy to use throughout the day, regardless of the situation. You can pick any transition that is fun and practical for your family, even something as simple as a countdown, like “3-2-1 all done”. Each time you end an activity—meals, bath time, play time, etc.—utilize your family’s transition routine.
The more consistently each caregiver transitions this way, the easier it will be for your child to move through difficult transitions.
Tip 2 - Show them what is going to happen next
Often, a toddler's frustration during a transition comes from not knowing what is going to happen next. SHOWING them what’s about to happen is a great strategy to ease their transition. When you SHOW as well as tell, you increase the odds that your child will understand what’s coming, even if they don't understand all of your words.
For example, if your child is playing and it's time to sit at the table for a snack, you might show them the snack and lead them to the table with the snack in your hand.
Tip 3 - Make a trade
Another great strategy to help your child transition is to offer a trade. You can trade them one fun activity or item for another that they enjoy. For example, you could give your toddler a toy truck to hold while you leave the park. If your toddler is playing with someone else’s toy, you could trade it for one of their own toys.
Having a transition item can prove very helpful in avoiding tantrums for toddlers. This can take a little planning ahead — to make it easy on yourself, try carrying a small toy in your purse or diaper bag to have ready for transition times.
Download our at home guide to smooth transitions - 3 activities included ↓
At home activity for helping toddlers with transitions
Transitioning with a Visual Countdown Built into an Activity
Materials:
Small toy cars or another item that your child likes to roll. It is best if you have at least 5 cars.
A slide or a ramp. You can use a toy car ramp from a store, or you can simply make one by leaning a book against the wall.
A container to store the cars in, preferably with a lid they can’t open
Set-up:
Set up all the cars and the ramp for your child to play with. Let them play with the cars for a while before it is time to put it away.
What to do:
In this activity, you will be helping your child anticipate a transition by showing them the number of objects they have left to play with (in this case, cars.)
Roll the cars with your child down the ramp. Have races and make sure that you make the activity fun.
When it is almost time for the transition to happen, tell your child “it is almost time to clean up!” Let them play a little bit more with the ramp. As you go, you can discreetly start putting cars in the box to decrease the amount of cars left in play. Say, “okay, we are going to roll FIVE more cars and then we will be all done.” Give your child 5 cars to put on the floor in front of them. You can even arrange the cars in a row so your child can see how many more they have. The rest of the cars go in the box.
Say, “oh boy, go ahead and roll your car!” Your child will roll the first car down the ramp. You will catch the car, and put it in the box. Point to the four remaining cars and say, “okay, 4 more cars and then all done! Go ahead, roll another one.” Your child will roll another car down the ramp and you will again catch the car and put it in the box. Continue with this routine, reminding your child how many turns are left by pointing to the line of cars that keeps getting shorter. Do not let your child grab additional cars out of the box.
When your child rolls the last car, catch it and put it in the box. Say, “okay, all done!” Immediately close the box. Don’t give your child any more cars or let them grab any cars. If you do this, then your child won’t believe you next time when there is a countdown.
If you feel that your child is going to tantrum when this activity ends, you can have a preferred activity planned next (such as a favorite snack.) In this case, instead of saying “three more cars, then all done” you can say “three more cars, then gummies.” The activity will end the same way as before, except when you close the box of cars you can immediately hand your child the gummies.
A visual countdown like this works to help your child end a preferred task, but can also be used to help them continue a non-preferred task. For example, if your child does not like bath you can present your child with 5 cups. Each time they fill a cup and pour it on their head to rinse, you remove the cup. When the cups are gone, then bathtime is all done. You would use the same strategy of describing what is going to happen (“three more pours, then bathtime is all done.”)
Note: Your child likely does not understand number quantities yet, but they don’t have to understand number words to have visual countdowns be meaningful. It is about seeing the quantity get smaller, not necessarily about knowing how to count.
What to say:
Here are some other ideas of countdowns and activities. Use this strategy only with activities where you can visually show the child the objects and they disappear after they use them.
“Three more goldfish, then snack time is all done.”
“Four more balls, then the ball toy is all done.”
Download our at home guide to smooth transitions - this activity + 2 more↓
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Created In Collaboration By:
Stephanie Keffer, MS CCC-SLP
Stephanie Burgener-Vader, MA CCC-SLP
Melissa Sartori, MS CCC-SLP
Yvette Faire-Bostick, MS CCC-SLP
© 2020-2022. Stephanie Keffer, MS CCC-SLP. All Rights Reserved.
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