Following Directions

As a parent, you play such an important role in nurturing your child’s language development. You do it every day without even thinking about it! Spending time and engaging with your child helps them build new skills. 

One essential skill is teaching your child to follow directions effectively. There are different kinds of directions. Some are really important for your child to follow, and others are just frustrating (but not dangerous) if they don’t listen to you. We’ll cover both types of directions - the ones you NEED your child to listen to and the ones it would be nice if they follow. 

And if you already know what you’re looking for, you can use any of these links to jump ahead to the section for you: 

• Teaching toddlers to follow emergency directions

• Milestones for following directions

• Tips for teaching your toddler to follow directions at home

Teach your toddler to follow emergency directions

When it comes to safety situations, it's crucial that your toddler pays attention to you when you shout, "Stop!" or "No!"

I won't suggest practicing these emergency scenarios because, obviously, our aim is to avoid them altogether.

However, there are a few things you can do to prepare your little one to listen when it truly matters:

• Firstly, try to minimize your use of "No!" outside of emergency situations as much as possible. I understand that completely eliminating it may not be realistic. However, it’s important to understand that when you say "No ___" repeatedly throughout the day, your little one might become immune to the word, and you'll end up being like the mom who cried wolf—they won't listen when you really need them to. 

  One effective approach to reducing the use of "No!" is redirecting your child's attention towards something else. Instead of saying "No banging," you could say, "Let's roll the car," or offer them a choice like, "Do you want to roll the car on the floor or up on the couch?"

• Additionally, use your tone of voice and volume to convey the seriousness of the situation. I think it goes without saying that our emergency tone of voice naturally comes out when we're scared. You want to be loud and serious to grab their attention.

These two tips, when combined, can be highly effective in ensuring that toddlers pay attention to emergency directions. Even if they don't stop completely, you'll at least capture their attention for a few seconds with your serious tone of voice and have a chance to intervene.

Following Directions Milestones for Toddlers

As a parent, it's natural to wonder when your toddler will start to grasp the concept of following directions. While every child develops at their own pace, there are general milestones to guide you along the way. 

Let's take a closer look at when toddlers typically learn to follow directions and the milestones you can expect during this exciting phase of their development.

12-18 Months: Building the Foundation

Around 12-18 months, toddlers begin laying the groundwork for following directions. During this stage, they are exploring their environment, developing basic motor skills, and starting to understand simple commands. They are learning the meaning of new words faster than they learn to say new words at this age. As their comprehension grows, you can introduce simple instructions and encourage their responses.

Milestones:

• Responding to familiar commands such as "Wave bye-bye" or "Give me a kiss."

• Following simple gestures like "Come here" or "Sit down."

18-24 Months: Grasping One-Step Directions

As your toddler approaches the 2-year mark, their receptive language skills expand, and they become more adept at following directions. At this stage, they can understand and carry out simple, one-step instructions consistently. Keep the directions clear, concise, and within their ability to comprehend.

Milestones:

• Following one-step directions consistently, such as "Bring me the book" or "Put the toy in the box."

• Responding to routine commands like "Wash your hands" or "Put on your shoes."

24-30 Months: Advancing to Two-Step Directions

Between the ages of 2 and 2.5 years, toddlers make significant progress in their ability to follow directions. They can now understand and execute two-step directions that involve sequential actions (directions that ask them to do two actions). This milestone marks an exciting stage in their receptive language development as they navigate more complex instructions.

Milestones:

• Following two-step directions consistently, such as "Take off your shoes and put them in the closet."

• Responding to requests involving actions, such as "Find your favorite toy and bring it to me."

30-36 Months: Sequential and Conditional Directions

As toddlers approach the age of 3, their language skills continue to flourish. They become increasingly proficient at following sequential and conditional directions. At this stage, their cognitive abilities allow them to comprehend and execute instructions with multiple steps and conditional clauses.

Milestones:

• Understanding and following sequential directions with more than two steps, like "Put on your coat, grab your backpack, and wait by the front door."

• Comprehending conditional directions, such as "If you finish your snack, then you can play with your toys."

Remember, these milestones provide a general guideline, and every child progresses at their own pace. It's essential to focus on creating a supportive and stimulating environment that encourages your toddler's receptive language development.

5 Speech Therapy Tips for Learning to Follow Directions

Here are 5 valuable speech therapy tips that I use to help toddlers who are learning how to follow directions:

1. Use lots of gestures

Visual clues can greatly enhance your toddler's understanding of directions. Pointing to what you want your child to do or gesturing can help your toddler understand. For example, if you want your toddler to put their cup in the dishwasher, point to the cup and then the dishwasher as you are giving the instruction. Showing your child what to do reinforces the verbal direction and helps your child grasp the meaning more easily. As you practice, you can ask them to follow a direction without any gestures or help to see if they are beginning to learn the meaning of your instructions. 

2. Break Directions Down

Breaking down instructions into smaller, manageable steps can make them easier for toddlers to follow. Rather than giving a direction that has many steps like "Go to your room, pick up your socks, and put them in the laundry basket," break it down into simpler steps: "Go to your room," followed by "Pick up your socks," and finally, "Put them in the laundry basket." This sequential approach allows your child to process and execute each step independently, leading to greater success in following directions. As they are ready, you can begin combining 2 and then 3 steps. 

3. Use Repetition and Reinforcement

Repetition is key when teaching toddlers to follow directions. Repeat the same instructions multiple times to reinforce the concept and help them learn the meaning of your instruction. This is especially helpful if you’re introducing a new action or word to your toddler. Use positive reinforcement, such as praise, to motivate your child and reinforce their efforts. For instance, when they successfully follow a direction, offer verbal praise such as “Thank you for putting your shoes in the basket” with a big smile on your face and extend your hand for a high-five. This positive feedback encourages them to continue practicing, which in turn improves their receptive language skills.

4. Incorporate Play and Interaction

Make learning fun and engaging by incorporating play and interaction into direction-following activities. Use toys, games, or pretend play scenarios that involve following instructions. For example, get out your stuffed animals and give your toddler directions like "Pass me the cow” or “Wash your paws puppy” as you play together. You could also play a game of Simon Says if that’s fun for your little one.  By integrating play, you create a stimulating environment that fosters active listening, comprehension, and cooperation.

5. Model and Scaffold

Modeling and scaffolding are effective techniques in speech therapy that can help toddlers learn to follow directions. Begin by modeling the desired behavior yourself. For instance, if you want your child to clean up their toys, demonstrate the action by picking up a toy and placing it in the designated spot. Then, provide support or prompts to guide your child's actions as they attempt to follow the same direction. Gradually decrease the level of support as their skills improve (this is called scaffolding), allowing them to perform the task independently.

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Teaching toddlers to follow directions is a journey that requires patience, consistency, and effective strategies. By incorporating speech therapy techniques into your interactions, you can foster your child's receptive language skills and enhance their ability to understand and execute instructions. Remember to use visual supports, break directions down, provide repetition and reinforcement, incorporate play, and utilize modeling and scaffolding. Celebrate each milestone and enjoy the progress your toddler makes on their language development journey.

Written By: Stephanie Hatleli, MS CCC-SLP

Here are a few more questions parents often ask about following directions:

• At what age do toddlers follow instructions?

  Toddlers follow their first directions either before or around the time of their first birthday. As their comprehension skills expand, they can follow more and more complex directions.

• Should a 2 year old be able to follow instructions?

  Yes, watch for a 2 year old to follow directions when you have their attention. As a speech therapist I look for 2 year olds to be following many different directions. Directions that they have practiced should be the easiest, and they generally are able to follow new or longer directions with support.

• Why is it important for toddlers to follow directions?

  Following directions in safety situations is most important - this helps keep your little one safe. Following other directions is also important as an indicator of how much your child understands.

• Why won't my 2 year old follow directions?

  Without meeting a child in person I can’t say why they aren’t following directions. Here are some things that may make it harder for your 2 year old to follow directions:

  • they’re not paying attention when you give directions and may have an easier time when you remove distractions and get at eye level when giving instructions

  • they’re having a hard time hearing and would benefit from visiting an ear doctor

  • they’re having a harder time understanding language and could benefit from a visit with a speech therapist

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